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  • kjlesficauthor

I have opinions. Wanna hear them? Bisexuality

I wanted to say something about the hurtful comments that have been tossed around on social media. I know I’m late to this—this is an entirely normal occurrence—but what I have to say is still important.

Bisexuality is real. It’s valid. Negative commentary like “bisexuality means not picking a side” or “bisexuality is having your cake and eating it, too” is mean, ill-informed, and ‘others’ a group of people, forcing them to sit on the bench for the entire game.

That sort of negative commentary marginalises bisexuality, not only in society but in the LGBTQI+ community as well, and it creates an internalised phobia for bi-folk already grappling with the thought that they’re not enough.

An example: when a bisexual woman enters into a relationship with another woman, they’re seen by mainstream society, and by some in the LGBTQIA+ community, as lesbian but not lesbian enough.

When a bisexual woman enters into a relationship with a man, they’re seen by mainstream society, and by some in the LGBTQIA+ community, as straight but not straight enough.

A person’s relationship status doesn’t define their sexuality. Absorbing a person you’re with just because you’re with them is not possible. Otherwise, that’s called U-hauling. (That’s a joke, folks)

But seriously, classifying a bisexual person because of who they’re with is actually called erasure. Bi folk struggle enough with identity without people holding giant erasers over their heads because they’re ready to scrub away a bisexual person’s existence.

Another example: Bisexual authors can write whatever the fuck they want, but to suggest to them that they should write an equal amount of straight fiction to queer fiction is ludicrous, judgemental and imposes a rule on creativity where there shouldn’t be one at all.

Bi-people are not half ’n half like that milk and not-milk weird stuff. They’re not two halves of anything, They are valid. They are enough. They are whole.

There is power in living your life and being your authentic self. Bisexual people shouldn’t have to prove themselves to be seen. They are already right here. Being amazing. And I am standing on a soapbox about this, because this topic is important and it pisses me off that there are people, some of them members of the LGBTQIA+ community, who think that the alphabet only has 25 letters.

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